Dear Mandy,
Happy Chinese New Year Eve!
Happy holidays to all! =)
Sunday, January 22, 2012
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Reflections on Code Blue Season 2
Dear Mandy...
As I finished watching Code Blue Season 2, it really struck me that most medical dramas such as Grey's Anatomy, cannot avoid looking at the medical scenarios without thinking and reflecting about life.
I've included this scene about Hiyama and Shiraishi here, because it is the very scene that I talked about in my previous post. And as I watched the scene again, I can't help but realise that more and more pieces of this scene are put together.
They're medical doctors, Shiraishi is not suspended, but she chose to use her spare time to comfort Hiyama instead of getting some rest or getting documentations done. Hiyama puts on a strong front, but Shiraishi knows her well enough that she would insist on giving her a makeshift hug to let her know it is ok to cry. And Hiyama must trust Shiraishi well enough to carry oon crying and sharing.
Do we really see that in the world today? In people?
Or do we increasingly live in a society that is increasingly unappreciative?
Well, I was doing a reading on discipline methods and classroom management, and there was a line that said "Teachers do not have much autonomy or control over the syllabus, but they are the ones held responsible for the performance of the students", or something along those lines. And I smiled ruefully, because many a time, we are responsible for things we did not initiate or do. And in trying to keep up with these responsibilities and the expectations of the world and the people around us, we more or less end up losing ourselves and become more inward looking.
So perhaps we should reconsider. What would Jesus do?
He never cared. He would leave the crowd, go to a mountain by himself to pray.
And what are we doing?
Getting caught in a rat race.
Time to re-evaluate my priorities and my beliefs. =)
As I finished watching Code Blue Season 2, it really struck me that most medical dramas such as Grey's Anatomy, cannot avoid looking at the medical scenarios without thinking and reflecting about life.
I've included this scene about Hiyama and Shiraishi here, because it is the very scene that I talked about in my previous post. And as I watched the scene again, I can't help but realise that more and more pieces of this scene are put together.
They're medical doctors, Shiraishi is not suspended, but she chose to use her spare time to comfort Hiyama instead of getting some rest or getting documentations done. Hiyama puts on a strong front, but Shiraishi knows her well enough that she would insist on giving her a makeshift hug to let her know it is ok to cry. And Hiyama must trust Shiraishi well enough to carry oon crying and sharing.
Do we really see that in the world today? In people?
Or do we increasingly live in a society that is increasingly unappreciative?
Well, I was doing a reading on discipline methods and classroom management, and there was a line that said "Teachers do not have much autonomy or control over the syllabus, but they are the ones held responsible for the performance of the students", or something along those lines. And I smiled ruefully, because many a time, we are responsible for things we did not initiate or do. And in trying to keep up with these responsibilities and the expectations of the world and the people around us, we more or less end up losing ourselves and become more inward looking.
So perhaps we should reconsider. What would Jesus do?
He never cared. He would leave the crowd, go to a mountain by himself to pray.
And what are we doing?
Getting caught in a rat race.
Time to re-evaluate my priorities and my beliefs. =)
Friday, January 13, 2012
Code Blue Ep 8: Mihoko Hiyama
Dear Mandy,
As I finished watching Code Blue Season 2 Episode 8, I'm drawn to what Mihoko Hiyama went through, and once again, am amazed at how I can relate to Mihoko...
In tending to a brain-dead 6 year old child, Tsubasa, his mother cries when she slowly comes to a realisation that her son is dead already. So in tears, she says that she would like to hug her child with her two arms. Mihoko, moved and trusting in the mother, unhooks the breathing machine, and lets his mother hug him. Point to note: the child would have died in a couple of hours, at most a day. The mother did not sign the "Do not resuscitate" form.
So, imagine what happens when the mother's brother decides to sue Mihoko and the hospital, because he thinks that she killed his nephew.
Mihoko is shaken, the hospital is shaken, and what is endearing is how Aizawa, Shiraishi, Saijima and Fujiwara rally around her. Mihoko breaks down because the mother's brother says in her face "you're a murderer". And it was heartwrenching when Mihoko says "I told myself I'll always remember the thanks that a patient gave me. Never did I expect that today I'll be called a murderer." And cries. Shiraishi, sitting beside her, initially pats her back, but is shoved away by Mihoko. So, she boldens, moves nearer, and pulls Mihoko near in a simple hug. Mihoko resists, but breaks down even more in the process.
So at the hearing, Tachibana, Mihoko's supervisor, tells Mihoko to share her true feelings. She is encouraged also by the head of Surgery. So she shares the true proceedings as to what happened. Especially how she thought that she had established understanding with Tsubasa's mother, before proceeding to unhook the machine. Of course, she was blasted with it, but Mihoko, infuriated, blasts out by saying "signing the DNR form is as though you are asking his mother to say her child is dead! And I just want to minimise any further pain to her!" before pausing and saying "any doctor who asks someone to sign a DNR form and remains calm and methodological about it is completely nuts."
At the end of the episode, Aizawa finds Mihoko in the emergency room. After a brief conversation, Mihoko cries badly as she says "I'm afraid to face the patients anymore. I'm scared of interacting with them."
As I reflected on Mihoko's predicament.. I realise that people hurt people. And sometimes, people want to get revenge as a means of venting their own anger, sadness and hurt. And more importantly... people are always focused on the end product, and very few people actually focus on the process. And I somehow sense that it is in the process, that there are much unseen tears, blood and perspiration. Simply because people don't care. As long as the end product looks good, that's all that matters. And that is a sad fact.
I realise that as much as I trust people, somewhere deep down, I'm scared too. We all have been hurt along the way by people in one way or another.. and many a time, nobody truly sees the hard work behind all the events and activities that are put out. Increasingly, we live in a world that is not as appreciative as it used to be? And perhaps that's why God calls us to live life differently. God is always concerned about our processes, our lives, and what we go through. And He's there every step of the way.
Perhaps that's why the old saying goes? People may fail you, but God never fails.
So, despite all my fears, apprehensions, and shortcomings, God still cares and loves.
I'd pray for Mihoko.. really. =)
As I finished watching Code Blue Season 2 Episode 8, I'm drawn to what Mihoko Hiyama went through, and once again, am amazed at how I can relate to Mihoko...
In tending to a brain-dead 6 year old child, Tsubasa, his mother cries when she slowly comes to a realisation that her son is dead already. So in tears, she says that she would like to hug her child with her two arms. Mihoko, moved and trusting in the mother, unhooks the breathing machine, and lets his mother hug him. Point to note: the child would have died in a couple of hours, at most a day. The mother did not sign the "Do not resuscitate" form.
So, imagine what happens when the mother's brother decides to sue Mihoko and the hospital, because he thinks that she killed his nephew.
Mihoko is shaken, the hospital is shaken, and what is endearing is how Aizawa, Shiraishi, Saijima and Fujiwara rally around her. Mihoko breaks down because the mother's brother says in her face "you're a murderer". And it was heartwrenching when Mihoko says "I told myself I'll always remember the thanks that a patient gave me. Never did I expect that today I'll be called a murderer." And cries. Shiraishi, sitting beside her, initially pats her back, but is shoved away by Mihoko. So, she boldens, moves nearer, and pulls Mihoko near in a simple hug. Mihoko resists, but breaks down even more in the process.
So at the hearing, Tachibana, Mihoko's supervisor, tells Mihoko to share her true feelings. She is encouraged also by the head of Surgery. So she shares the true proceedings as to what happened. Especially how she thought that she had established understanding with Tsubasa's mother, before proceeding to unhook the machine. Of course, she was blasted with it, but Mihoko, infuriated, blasts out by saying "signing the DNR form is as though you are asking his mother to say her child is dead! And I just want to minimise any further pain to her!" before pausing and saying "any doctor who asks someone to sign a DNR form and remains calm and methodological about it is completely nuts."
At the end of the episode, Aizawa finds Mihoko in the emergency room. After a brief conversation, Mihoko cries badly as she says "I'm afraid to face the patients anymore. I'm scared of interacting with them."
As I reflected on Mihoko's predicament.. I realise that people hurt people. And sometimes, people want to get revenge as a means of venting their own anger, sadness and hurt. And more importantly... people are always focused on the end product, and very few people actually focus on the process. And I somehow sense that it is in the process, that there are much unseen tears, blood and perspiration. Simply because people don't care. As long as the end product looks good, that's all that matters. And that is a sad fact.
I realise that as much as I trust people, somewhere deep down, I'm scared too. We all have been hurt along the way by people in one way or another.. and many a time, nobody truly sees the hard work behind all the events and activities that are put out. Increasingly, we live in a world that is not as appreciative as it used to be? And perhaps that's why God calls us to live life differently. God is always concerned about our processes, our lives, and what we go through. And He's there every step of the way.
Perhaps that's why the old saying goes? People may fail you, but God never fails.
So, despite all my fears, apprehensions, and shortcomings, God still cares and loves.
I'd pray for Mihoko.. really. =)
Friday, January 06, 2012
Shiraishi in Episode 3 of Code Blue Season 2
Dear Mandy...
I just finished watching Code Blue Season 2's episode 3. It was a really heartwrenching moment for me actually..
The scene begins with talking about how human beings are generally people who lie? And in the disaster whereby someone fell, and there was a stampede, Shiraishi came across this guy who had breathing difficulties. So on the spot, being emergency doctors, Shiraishi had to insert a catheter into his lungs. However, due to the guy having heart problems, was forced to do surgery there and then.
The Shiraishi of Season 1 would have faltered, and considered the feelings of the people around, but as her experiences have, moulded her to become a cool, calm operating doctor, doing what is needed without room for emotional consideration. She was forced to stop massaging the heart of the victim, because his heart simply would not take it. And in her face, the guy's mother screamed "Are you a devil? How can you stop when he still has consciousness?" To which, Shiraishi just looks down and mumbles an apology.
It isn't until afterward when Shiraishi and Aizawa are forced to take the train back to the hospital as they were the last two on the spot, that Shiraishi lets her emotions run over her when she sees a mother and child conversing in the train. Aizawa shields her from public eye by standing in front of her, and Shiraishi just lets her emotions flow.
As i reflect on Shiraishi and what she did... part of me can't help but understand and resonate with what she is going through. How many times have I had to shelf my emotions and just do what is required of me, only to truly truly come back thereafter, and let the emotions wash over me overwhelmingly? The truth? Quite a few. So I really thank God that He comes through in my moments of weakness.
I'm not as strong as I seem to be, and yes, I do cry. I do worry.
I just happen to become really good at shelfing things. =)
Thank God for Him, because otherwise, I'm not sure what I'll be.
So.. will I stop shelfing things? I don't think so.
Will I start to share more so that I don't let the shelf clutter too much? Well, I'm not sure.
But I do know that God clears that shelf for me ever so often.
It's just a difficult and lonely journey to walk, but one that's never alone. =)
I just finished watching Code Blue Season 2's episode 3. It was a really heartwrenching moment for me actually..
The scene begins with talking about how human beings are generally people who lie? And in the disaster whereby someone fell, and there was a stampede, Shiraishi came across this guy who had breathing difficulties. So on the spot, being emergency doctors, Shiraishi had to insert a catheter into his lungs. However, due to the guy having heart problems, was forced to do surgery there and then.
The Shiraishi of Season 1 would have faltered, and considered the feelings of the people around, but as her experiences have, moulded her to become a cool, calm operating doctor, doing what is needed without room for emotional consideration. She was forced to stop massaging the heart of the victim, because his heart simply would not take it. And in her face, the guy's mother screamed "Are you a devil? How can you stop when he still has consciousness?" To which, Shiraishi just looks down and mumbles an apology.
It isn't until afterward when Shiraishi and Aizawa are forced to take the train back to the hospital as they were the last two on the spot, that Shiraishi lets her emotions run over her when she sees a mother and child conversing in the train. Aizawa shields her from public eye by standing in front of her, and Shiraishi just lets her emotions flow.
As i reflect on Shiraishi and what she did... part of me can't help but understand and resonate with what she is going through. How many times have I had to shelf my emotions and just do what is required of me, only to truly truly come back thereafter, and let the emotions wash over me overwhelmingly? The truth? Quite a few. So I really thank God that He comes through in my moments of weakness.
I'm not as strong as I seem to be, and yes, I do cry. I do worry.
I just happen to become really good at shelfing things. =)
Thank God for Him, because otherwise, I'm not sure what I'll be.
So.. will I stop shelfing things? I don't think so.
Will I start to share more so that I don't let the shelf clutter too much? Well, I'm not sure.
But I do know that God clears that shelf for me ever so often.
It's just a difficult and lonely journey to walk, but one that's never alone. =)
Tuesday, January 03, 2012
Comeback Madonna Special!
Dear Mandy,
When I watched this movie, and this song came on in Episode 11, I really fell in love with it.
It speaks of pursuing your dreams, it speaks of coming back in a different light, but living true to your dreams and beliefs.
If you ask me, it is kind of hard to live out your dreams in today's world, and I take my hat off to those who do.
I sometimes have weird and crazy thoughts of going to try out for auditions when the Korean companies come to Singapore? But I also know that's not my calling. I love to sing, I enjoy dancing, but truth be told, I see myself living out my childhood dream of being a teacher in time to come. God has been really good, and the experiences that I've gone through thus far, have always led me to come back to a teaching approach and profession.
But in any case.. this is one song that will always remind me not to give up when the going gets tough. =)
I love the bridge the most. =)
I hope you enjoy this song and be as inspired by it as I was. =)
When I watched this movie, and this song came on in Episode 11, I really fell in love with it.
It speaks of pursuing your dreams, it speaks of coming back in a different light, but living true to your dreams and beliefs.
If you ask me, it is kind of hard to live out your dreams in today's world, and I take my hat off to those who do.
I sometimes have weird and crazy thoughts of going to try out for auditions when the Korean companies come to Singapore? But I also know that's not my calling. I love to sing, I enjoy dancing, but truth be told, I see myself living out my childhood dream of being a teacher in time to come. God has been really good, and the experiences that I've gone through thus far, have always led me to come back to a teaching approach and profession.
But in any case.. this is one song that will always remind me not to give up when the going gets tough. =)
I love the bridge the most. =)
I hope you enjoy this song and be as inspired by it as I was. =)
Sunday, January 01, 2012
Dear Mandy...
It's not even been 24 hours yet, and somehow, the year ahead looks challenging already. =)
GESL... Ministry... NIE... each bring to the table a different issue, and I'm tempted... very tempted... to just put down the World and say farewell as I travel around it. But as I say: I'm tempted. I know I won't do it.
In just a paltry 24 hours.. it's driving me to an extent that I'm already asking God to help see me through this year. Because for starters... it's not going to be easy, because if this is an inclination of what is to come, then I think I'm in for a rough ride. Then again.. nobody said it'd be easy.
I'll see it through by grace. =)
It's not even been 24 hours yet, and somehow, the year ahead looks challenging already. =)
GESL... Ministry... NIE... each bring to the table a different issue, and I'm tempted... very tempted... to just put down the World and say farewell as I travel around it. But as I say: I'm tempted. I know I won't do it.
In just a paltry 24 hours.. it's driving me to an extent that I'm already asking God to help see me through this year. Because for starters... it's not going to be easy, because if this is an inclination of what is to come, then I think I'm in for a rough ride. Then again.. nobody said it'd be easy.
I'll see it through by grace. =)
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